The Man Who Moved Me

Rarely you ever meet a guy who had intentions of knowing you. Rarely you ever meet a guy who wants to see you again and not thinking of what he really wants if you know what I mean.

He's a guy beyond my expectations, unpredictable, funny, smart, spiritually faithful, and everything my opposite. He's a man you rarely see and meet, have a talk, made sense and you'll agree because it's true. He's a guy you thought as the same as others. Well that was what I felt at first. I could not trust him. I had inhibitions and hesitations about this guy at first. When I started talking about things I know he wouldn't care of or may think weird. He listened. I can see he's interested to what I am saying, then I stopped talking because I wouldn't know if I can trust him. He stared at me, really hard. I looked away from him. He stared so uncomfortably like he wants me naked. I feel like covering my chest when he stared at me like that. He wasn't talking much that time. He wants me to talk more, but I don't talk much. I know it's the first meeting. Hours went by and he made me feel comfortable and yes the rest is history in a positive way.

I thought he wouldn't want me anymore. Yet he did. He initiated the communication though I don't want it as. He insisted. I like him too but I don't know how. What really changed me the most inside was when he had the "talk" with me. I've seen how he talks. He talks seriously with a bit of humor. He knows what he's talking about. He talks with full honesty without pausing. He keeps repeating important words so that I may remember and I did. He say things in positive way. He's so sure of everthing he said to me. He doesn't use the words expecting or hoping. He wanted things to happen. He understands how my emotions change rapidly.

He changed a part of me. He made me see the daylight again. He believes in what I can do. He made me stronger now. His hugs are the most powerful tool he used on me. He's like an angel covering me with his wings protecting me from anything negative and bad. He moved me like no one does. A move far from my imagination. It's magical, spiritual, romantic, surreal, artistic, colorful, musical and most of all loving. He made me smile more. He made me laugh loud like what I was doing before. He's a miracle. He's the man who moved me.

Not an Ordinary Bookshop

Last Sunday I went to buy my mom some pair of reading glasses, there are a lot of people at the mall. I decided not to stay there any longer. I wanted to go to the National Bookstore yet it’s hot inside and of course a lot of people too. I decided to just walk around outside the mall yet there are still a lot of people walking, talking and too noisy. I went somewhere at Burnharm Park and find something to eat. I craved that day for shawarma, siomai, and nuggets. I ate my heart out and I was full. I don’t want to home yet so I walked for 30 minutes thinking where I should go.

Suddenly I remembered a new bookshop was built here in Baguio. I know it’s been there for a while I just have no time to check it out. Then the opportunity came and that was Sunday since I don’t know where to go and just wanted to be alone. My tired feet wants to give up yet my brain says you got to check it out.

So I don’t want to take any ride just wanted to walk with my earphones on. I took a look around Baguio for a while walking and thought it really did change but I would still love it no matter what.

So as I was nearing the shop I remembered those people who said to me that the books they sell are not those that can be seen in famous bookstores. As I nearing the sign of the bookshop I don’t know where to enter. There was someone behind me who I recognized was from Sitel then someone from the bookshop came out from it’s like their reading area, maybe he’s the owner. He spoke to her and said “take the stairs”, so I followed.

There are rose petals scattered from each corner of the stair. The light is dim but the ambience feels great. It’s not yet the bookshop as I entered the hallway I saw swing doors and I entered. The place is great. I went right away to the first bookshelf I’ve seen. I did not even checked out what were hanging around or the posters but I’ve got to see the books. Checking the first book that I’ve seen was Martial Law Babies by Arnorld Arre, this is exciting a Filipino writer. Browse, browse then I saw a compilation of stories that fits what I am reading. I picked the book and I saw Filipino authors wrote horror, fantasy and mystery fiction stories. Wow I was like hit by a baseball bat. They’re inspirational. I am to buy that book soon if it’s still there and if I have money.

The Mt. Cloud Bookshop is not just your ordinary bookshop. It caters to those people who reads on anything that is beyond the ordinary. Most books that I've found there are about the culture and traditions of indigenous people mostly here in Cordillera which is adherent to know what is happening to them and how their lives are. The ambiance of the bookshop is great.  It's away from a lot of people. You are also able to drink coffee and beer while browsing on some of their books. There are comfortable chairs in front of the shelves and you are allowed to sit on the floor while reading.

I've also scanned their graphic novels which is very Filipino and honest. There are children's books as well mostly were written by Filipinos. You are allowed to rent the comic books by hour. The interior of the bookshop was made by artists I suppose because of how the decorations were made. I suppose they were made by Baguio artists. 

The bookshop promotes national writers which is good for exposure for those whose passion is to write. Shares to everyone their talent and be an inspiration.

Oh my favorite thing that was displayed inside was the typewriter.

They're open 12pm-8pm Tuesday to Sunday
They are located at Casa Vallejo, Upper Session Road














Mt. Cloud Bookshop: 

Rising from where your soles touch the ground, rumbling in your tummy, dancing where your heart pulses and your breath moves, filling the space between your ears.

Writer's Block Part 2

Spider Jerusalem

Still nothing is coming out of my brain, yet I’m thinking of a lot. I want to write about comic books, oh especially Scott Pilgrim which was made into movie. I want to find out who Spider Jerusalem is. My friend suggested me to read a graphic novel, called Transmetropolitan. I’ve met Spider Jerusalem in Google and yeah he rocks! He’s not handsome, he’s old, he’s bald and he’s a fighter. He wears a pair of shades but with different colors. He’s a renegade gonzo journalist. I still haven’t read the comic book, but he’s trying to find me a copy and I’m so excited. This is great being one of the boys.

Let me explain what gonzo journalism is. I am intrigued as well or how this style of journalism exists and how it became to be. Gonzo journalism is written subjectively and the reporter is included in the report. Gonzo journalism is written via first-person narrative. This makes it exciting because you are able to experience the report as if you part of it. I may say it’s like an adventure. I could imagine myself writing then closing my eyes being in the scene and feeling the events as they happen. I may not be a journalist but I may learn how they do it.

Hunter S. Thompson

The term gonzo was first used by Hunter S. Thompson. Now I know where they derive the character from Transmetropolitan. It’s from a real person and he looks like him as well. He used the word gonzo in 1970 in an article. This type of journalism favors more the style than accuracy and often uses personal experiences and emotions to provide the body of the topic. It does not include any “polished” editing just like how newspaper media does. Writers tend to write rough. They often use sarcasm, humor, exaggeration and profanity as part of the writing.

I guess it’s not a writer’s block anyway but I guess this was not one of my topics and just suddenly came out of nowhere. I’m going to look for this comic book and once I’ve read it. I’m going to share it to you. It’s all about writing real and honest.

Look at their similarities! 

  

“If I’d written the truth I knew for the past ten years, about 600 people- including me- would be rotting in prison cells from Rio to Seattle today. Absolute truth is a very rare and dangerous commodity in the context of professional journalism.” –Hunter S. Thompson Rolling Stone, February 15, 1973

Writer's Block Mode

Right now I’m in writer’s block mode, but I am gathering ideas from different social networking sites like Facebook and Tumblr. Okay they are not helpful for now because I am playing one of Facebook games which called the It Girl. I kind of like it you know. You have to dress your character, find her a boyfriend, shop to different boutiques and buy clothes and complete quests so that she would level up. One thing more she has to showdown with other It Girls to level up and earn money too. Well I know you don’t want to know what I am doing right now but I want to share it.

Another site where I share my thoughts is Tumblr but I guess no one’s paying attention it. I only have 14 followers but that’s okay. I’m not for the fame anyway. What I love about the site are those kids that post pictures, quotes and thoughts that are good for the eyes, mind and self esteem. Their age ranges from 12 to 18 years old. Their Tumblrs are better than mine I suppose. Mine are just rants about what I think everyday but you can learn from it. They maybe positive and negative stuff but they’re honest. If you want to check what’s on my Tumblr here’s the link:

http://chimeangel01.tumblr.com/

Since nothing’s coming out from my brain I would like to share how I feel today. I’m feeling a little better now. I’m calm for the moment I hope it wouldn’t stab me back. I wasn’t able to sleep well. I’ve been sighing too long and that’s a sign that I’m sad. For the next days I hope I’ll be back as Joyce, your cheerful, out of nowhere and free spirited girl. After I’m through with this I’m treating myself with lot of sweets. Thanks for understanding if anyone out there is reading my blog.

“It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels, heaven or hell.”

Buddha

When Darkness Fell

Have you ever felt that sometimes you hated yourself? Most of the time I feel that and it sucks. You have to refrain being with other people because you might hurt them. I avoid relationships because it’s hard for me to handle. I avoid relationships because I am afraid of myself. I’m afraid of what’s inside my head. I prefer to stay quiet all the time.

The last few days have been hard for me. I don’t know how to deal with myself. I lock myself inside the room and don’t even eat for a day. I feel lazy and asleep during the day and I am awake during the night. I have stories in my head but it’s all about a girl always left alone somewhere and has to deal with herself. Different settings and different storylines but it always goes back to the girl blaming herself.

Right now I am working on modifying Red Riding Hood’s story, though there is a movie coming out this year in Red Riding Hood. I’ve been dying to make stories about the fairy tale world. I’ve changed the story where her grand mother was eaten by the wolf but it is not really a wolf but a person he ones knew. The first scene from the story is from Red Hiding Hood looking for her little sister in the woods. She’s all grown up now with anger, guilt and madness inside her.

I’ll be sharing my stories to a separate blog when I’m ready to post some. My stories include about zombies in the 70’s and a girl left behind by his father in a farm where she is not allowed to leave the house.

Yeah that’s right! That’s where my depression is going. This is where my mind taking me. Somewhere dark and sad yet I am coping. I can handle stuff like this. There are other things that let me occupy to do unpleasant things. I don’t want other people to worry. I don’t want them to be inside my dark place. I lie about telling them that I’m okay.

My friends told me that I seem far away from them lately. Yes I am doing this so that they would not worry much. It’s hard for me, if only they knew. I won’t let them know. I’ll be fine on my own, I guess. Revealing myself to a blog is hard but relieving.

I would like to say sorry to them. I started to walk away from them because of my emotions that are not predictable.

“Imagine time as something that can be held in your hands and turned.”

Meet My Stray Cat

I named him Meow Meow because he is a cat obviously. How did we met? Well it's a long and funny story. I had him when I was still in college. It started as when my last class ended. We would meet with my friends at our hang-out. We know exactly where to find each other. Every afternoon or in the evening some of my friends will invite us to drink beer. We would say yes of course. We'd drink to the place where we know the owner. So we had drank 2 beers each I think. I do not remember exactly but I got a little tipsy.

After we had the drink we ate dinner, that's the time we are about to meet. We went to a karinderya (that's how we call our small and cheap yet delicious food restaurant, I might say). After we are done eating, we noticed that it was raining outside. We don't have umbrellas. We waited for the rain to stop, that's when I noticed a kitten being chained at the corner outside the door where there is an unidentified tree. I don't know what kind of tree that was. There were three dogs surrounding the kitten. It's like they're trying to get him. I know I always got this feeling that I need to do something about it. I went near them and I shooed the dogs away. I held the kitten, but he was still scared. He seemed hurt by the chain around his neck. He's scared because some dogs bullied him.

The rain just stopped. I was there at his side comforting him and my friends are at the other side of road. I had my big black polka dotted shoulder bag. They were calling me to go, but I just couldn't live him there. I tried to remove the chain from his neck. It's kind of hard, so I slipped his head slowly away from the chain, Thank goodness his head was small. Oh and it was removed I opened my bag. I put him as fast as I can inside it. My friends saw me and they started laughing and shouting at me. "Someone's getting your cat!" One of my friend shouted at me. I ran as fast I can towards them. I told them someone purposely put the kitten there because they don't want him.

I adopted him and for four years he was happy with me. We had the best four years together. He ran away though and never seen him for days, until my dad saw him at the woods. I got sad but he really had to go away. I will never forget him and I wish he would never forget me too.

Hiss Hiss I'm Not A Snake!

My love for entomology started when we were catching dragonflies and grasshoppers as a kid. We love the insect world. My brothers were collecting spiders as I collect beetles and grasshoppers. We even look for praying mantis and then take care of it for it days. We catch flies as for their meal. We would be amazed with stick insects as they looked like twigs. We would get them for a while and then freed them after.

I still love insects. They represent how beautiful our planet is. They represent to take care of the environment. Right now let me tell you about the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach. When I told my friends that I want one, they just go “Eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwww!” I hate roaches that fly but this one is harmless and does not carry deadly diseases. Most especially I like how they create their hissing sound.

This insect hails from the island of Madagascar. Well Madagascar has a lot of unique and fascinating animal species and one of them is the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach. They are shiny brown and oval shaped. They have no wings and have a single pair of antennae. The males have horns which gives them an unusual look. Males use their horns as to defend theirselves or to fight with other horned mammals. Winning roaches hiss more so the sounds may be used to help determine a roach hierarchy.

The reason why I want one is because of their hissing sound. Hissing is part of their mating ritual and used as an effective alarm cry. How do they hiss? They exhale air through their breathing holes. These breathing pores or spiracles are found on each segment of their thorax and abdomen. There are three forms of hiss, first the disturbance hiss, the female attracting hiss and the fighting hiss.

They inhibit the Madagascar grounds where they hide in leaf litter, logs and other debris. They scavenge at night feeding on fruit or plant materials. They are vegetarian so don’t worry about getting disease. They don’t bite as well.