The Fault In Our Stars: A Review

Young adult writer like John Green executes his books with humor, heart and life such as how he did with his novel The Fault In Our Stars.  This is not a story about surviving cancer or life itself but it’s how someone remembers you when you are gone. The plot may have ended tragic but the important message is a memory left that must not be forgotten. This is a sad love story like Romeo and Juliet minus the suicide of Juliet but adding cancer as the villain.

Hazel Lancaster being the narrator and the protagonist of this book starts her journey as a 16 year-old thyroid cancer patient. Depression is eating her up so her mom lets her join this support group for cancer kids where he meets 17 year old Augustus Waters who was diagnosed with osteosarcoma at a young age.  His right leg was amputated. The first time they’ve set their eyes on each other, there’s a spark. I know, this book is full of clichés but I love how the author turned them fresh and new since this is a teen love story. They got to know each other: Hazel loves to read and Augustus was an ex basketball player. Her favorite book in this planet is An Imperial Infliction but it wasn’t finished so she emails the author, Peter Van Houten asking how the story ended. No response from him but when it was Augustus turned to email him he responded but did not answer the question either since he also got interested with the book. He’s upset since it didn’t have an ending. 

He proves his love to Hazel by giving his wish to Hazel.  She wants to go to Amsterdam, find the author and finish the novel. They’ve get to experience a dinner and enjoy the sparkling scenery of the Amsterdam Canal and stayed on Hotel de Filosoof. But once they’ve met the author he’s alcoholic, rude and a nasty man. The trip was arranged by his secretary who’s kind and generous enough to fulfill their wish. They left the house of the author angry and frustrated. They went home with some unanswered questions. Some ugly events happened when they went flew back home. Augustus already knew that his end is coming near.  The cancer is spreading throughout his body and she sees him slowly deteriorating.
He died a week after he needed to hear the eulogies of his Hazel and his friend.  This book is a real tearjerker especially when she found out that Augustus wrote a eulogy for her and he needs Van Houten to edit it. The fault is really in their stars: they’re destined to meet but also destined to be apart from life. Death may have ended their love story but it left a legacy of optimism towards her and life.  And I deeply praise John Green for writing this book. It made me laugh and cried more but most importantly it made my mind and heart stimulate of things to ponder and choices to make.

Rate: 4.5/5 

The Frequency of Radiohead

Every once in a while a band with different sound emerges from the deep. A unique music with a certain sadness yet it's still inviting. The voice of Thom Yorke has a timbre of soothness that it goes with his emotions. A soundtrack relatable  to loneliness, melancholia, aloneness, but it has mystery that gives the band its name. The slowness of the instruments played gives effect each member of the band contributes to the voice of the frontman, as he succumb to the lyrics. This band can write songs that pertains a journey through a deep tunnel. The lyrics may have sublimnal meaning and can be interpreted by different listeners. As I listened to them, I haven't notice that a tear was already on my cheek.This is also the soundtrack of who I am, together with Haruki Murakami which contributes to my emotions.

I never stopped listening to them. I grew up listening to them. I'll still be listening to them even when I grow old.

"Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry.."

Thus "Boredom Kills"

I've seen him in the last few days. Invisible yet it has a strong. It slowly tortures you as the time goes by. As hours pass, it succumbs inside me as I lay down to think what I should do.
Thinking! Thinking! Thinking! Sigh!
There's nothing to do, but to toss and turn. All I can do is to wait for me to fall asleep. Do everything in my dream. Hours and hours passed.
It seems like days. This excruciating torture is nothing physical but mentally. It surpasses the brain nerves without even knowing it's even there.
More sigh! More hours had passed and my brains are almost getting fried. There's no one to talk to. It's like I'm inside an asylum, paranoid on just about everything.
I'm starting to stutter, stare at a lot of things and boom, I'll explode into nothingness or yet a question of existence but somewhere else.

Melancholia Is The Name of a Planet

Melancholia is an emotion. It's a feeling of deep sadness and quietness. Amidst hundreds of people out there, one person sits and think of things that are unthinkable. Teary eyed. Unfinished food. Noisy chattering of  people which cannot be understood. Gibberish as it may seem. Amidst the people around, there is melancholia. It's different from depression but it sort of like the same. Amidst hundreds of people smiling, there are other mixed emotions felt at the same time. Cornered by what everybody knows as "compartmentalization." Well not everybody knows this but somehow unconsciously it's there. They're just not aware but they can feel it everyday. The whole day and even in their dreams. The dress that you've only wore once was soaked with you in the river. Floating with flowers in your hand, lifeless like, staring blankly at the sky. Waking up, and not knowingly people are out there. Celebrating your happiness but you know you are not happy. You tried to run away but only unconsciously and not physically. Your white dress slowly floats as if time had frozen. but not again. The green luscious surrounding witnessed your running away stunt. Denying would only make it worse. Somewhere lightyears away, there's a heavenly body behind the sun. Somewhere light years away, it's coming near the planet earth. It's not yet felt for now, but soon it will. Hailstorm, hurricane, flood, heatwave are expected in the future. While you drown yourself with anguish, sadness, bitterness, and frustration from the life you thought was going to be "perfect." It doesn't going to end well well. But it will end right.

It will end the world.  It will end your misery. It's going to cause chaos but in an organized way where no one will be left alive except you. Is this the change you want? If not, then how? From lightyears away there is heavenly body called Melancholia. Should  planet earth be the one to be called that name. You know there are full of people who looks happy but they are not. They are smiling but not either. You are just faced upside down. Or pretending to be... then the collision countdown starts in an hour.

based from the movie of Lars Von Trier                                                                                                                                                           

A Random Poem

She knows that time can never be hers.
And time can never be his.
Distance approach as her tears starts to fall.
She sees the Knight behind her, not towards her.
Oh Knight! She wished of the Fairy Blue’s magic.
“Time be not an enemy, Fairy Blue please send your magic dust.
Send the Knight back to me.
I am falling back into my shadow. When you are lost in
my heart and forever just a dream.”
"If Death is the only answer
then Death I shall call" she said
"If its deathscythte will struck my heart
then forever he is me.. "
The Fairy Blue heard her but it's not her wish
she wants. She wants her to wake up from
the meander she made with the Knight.
She wants to stop the tears and the thoughts
of Death. The Fairy Blue sprinkled the magic
dust..

This poem was written on the 10th of January 2011. This was just suppose to be a connecting ideas with other poets from a social networking site. There is one line from a member then continued by others with their own thoughts. I separated mine and it made sense putting them together. And I don't have a title for it for now. Just sharing it. 

The Science of Heartbroken

When human beings fall in love they feel certain happiness inside. They feel all the positive energy coming around them. They would establish good relationship with other people. They will do nice things toward their lover and also to their family. But just like everybody knows the heart is involve in these feeling of love but in fact it’s the brain. There are certain chemicals responsible for this kind of emotion. They are called the oxytoxin and vasopressin but what happens to these chemicals when someone got dumped or heartbroken.

What is oxytocin? This chemical is being released by the brain while a person is in a relationship. It deepens the relationship where trust and faithfulness enters. The emotions are deepen towards each other that they’d rather be together everyday and all that they can see are just their selves. This is important towards strengthening the emotions of each other. Before the oxytocin there is an initial chemicals that are released they’re called the dopamine, serotonin, and adrenaline which is responsible for the attraction towards other people. They are neurotransmitters responsible to the first emotions that a person feels when falling in love. These chemicals will reverse once the feeling of heartbroken introduces itself.

The autonomic nervous system is the first that’s being affected. There will be a change of heart rate, blood flow, blood pressure and digestion but these are just some the effects. The cortisol is the hormone responsible for the stress rises and frails the immune system causing fatigue and sickness. The person will experience insomnia or just lying on the bed having a hard time to sleep. The main brain chemicals for the person’s emotions on the feeling the love is being withdrawn when heartbroken occurred. The decrease of oxytocin will increase anxiety and fear to a full level. They are having a hard time sleeping, eating and working because all the motivation is gone.

 

This maybe the case but life goes on because the brain will return to normal and you will have your life back after you are done with this stage. This is the stage of recovery where you start over again and meet another person. 

Taken by Cars Taking Me

This is the new line up of the band

This is just the kind of band that I would be dancing all through out the evening. Taken by Cars is an indie band based in Manila. Their music as I will describe is a blend of electronic and rock with a twist of new wave. The first single that I’ve heard from them was Uh-Oh and I loved it. I said I need to hear the other songs on their first album Endings of a New Kind. I can say that their songs can be great if you are traveling far and you are beside the window of the car. Just listen to how fast the beat of the drums as it plays together with the other instruments blending with the androgynous, sweet voice of Sarah Marco. They may sound like other bands hailing from U.K. like Bloc Party which I also love listening to. They may sound like other bands but for me they are the first Filipino band that I’m listening to this kind of genre. The other songs that I fell in love with the first album are Stereolove, Shapeshifter, Colourway and The Afterhours.

This was the first line up of  the band

The second album which is called Dualist has cleaner instrument execution and the voice of Sarah is still as smooth and sweet. I even love this album than the previous. My favorite single from the album is 34 and I played it like 5 times just today. This Is Our City is also a catchy single. As a whole this band is great and thank goodness I will finally see and hear them play here in Baguio. I can’t wait for that day.

They will be performing in Ayuyang on September 17, 2011 with other Manila bands such as Pedicab and Miscellaneous and of course our one and only representative Skydive Academy which by the way our friends. I would be dancing all night by this gig and just savor the music and beer as the night forwards to morning. See you Baguio pips on Sept. 17.

The band:

Sarah Marco: Vocals 

Bryce Zialcita: Lead Guitars

Derek "Siopao" Chua: Rhythm Guitars

Isa Garcia: Bass

Bryan Kong: Drums and Sample